Thai-way or the highway. Embracing the difference.

Peace Corps is unlike anything I have ever done in my life. It continues to challenge me daily and I don't plan on it getting less challenging anytime soon. I feel like I have had a personal breakthrough recently and have discovered some revelations that are true for myself. I still struggle with the challenge of writing down all the thoughts I have in my head and explaining this experience in words. So bear with me as I try. First I will lay some foundation....

#1 Culture Shock. Cultural differences.

Here in Thailand up is down. Left is right. Towels for your feet are used for your face. Toilet paper is kept in the kitchen to use as a napkin and there is a sprayer in the bathroom for your bottom. They put corn in sweet treats such as ice cream. Busses, trains, vans, and all forms of transportation come and go as they please and people wait without complaint because this is Thailand.

I remember one of my first papers in Grad School was about my world view. How my growing up determined how I viewed things. How my world view was shaped and what I see as right and wrong. I have gone back to that paper. Re-read it and re-wrote it. In the two years since I wrote that paper my world view has completely changed and I know that after being in Thailand for two years my world view will continue to change.

Through my current world view, here are some cultural aspects about Thailand that are challenging for me:

Kids are still hit in schools. It starts young, like preschool. It is hard, not on the butt and usually done in front of others to cause embarrassment.

Critical thinking is not encouraged. You do not challenge your teacher. What the teacher says is truth. Your teacher is seen as a second parent raising you.

If you have a problem with someone, it more appropriate for you to tell your problem to the persons friend rather then directly to them. The friend can then tell the friend.

Nothing is direct.

Yes means no sometimes. You can agree to go somewhere and know right well you don't plan on going but say yes anyway. When you don't show up....its ok.

There is a concept called "saving face" this means that self control, self respect, and the respect of others in the social hierarchy are VERY important. To put it in other terms, saving face is a major case of keeping up appearances. If you "break someones face" it is more on you than them. You are making a fool out of yourself, not the other person.
Gentle example: A man who works at high level in the local health office liked making fun of me for being a boy. Saying I was the prettiest boy ever. Making fun of me in a less than kind way. If I would have said to him something along the lines of "why are you being a jerk to me?" or  "stop being rude" I would have broken his face. In turn showing that I am not mature enough to handle my emotions.
Not so gentle example: You see a man physically abusing a woman near your house. You start yelling for it to stop and don't know what to do. Someone tells you that the two individuals are part of your host families extended family, and the correct action to take during this is to stand back and let the elder of the family handle it.  By intervening in such a scene would result in you disrespecting the Elder of your house, the man abusing the woman, and the woman being abused. You broke their face.
To fully understand the concept of saving face, you have to also understand how Buddhism influences this cultural rule. One of the main points in Buddhism is to remain equanamous, neutral. Not to show aversion or desire to anything.

Now I know that after reading some of those things you yourself are thinking holy shit balls that is so fucked up...so...wrong.

I have to/choose to live in this different society for two years. The first step in understand cultural things that I think are so wrong is to recognize my own world view. Recognize what has shaped me to be the person that I am. How those experiences helped me determine what is right and what is wrong. I have full freedom not to agree with these examples, but I feel like I have an obligation to my community and this society to begin to understand them. To understanding how the general world views of Thais became to be, what influences how they see right and wrong, understanding Thai Buddhism and respecting it. Finding the resiliency in this society. It is not my responsibility to bring my American world views to Thailand and say "you're doing it all wrong".  It is my responsibility to come to Thailand and say, show me your culture, I will respect your culture. I am in your culture now, I need to adjust to see things differently.

Step 1...Know your personal world view
Step 2...Be aware of the differences in your personal world view and the world view of the society you are living in.
Step 3...Know that no world view is right or wrong, it is different.
Step 4...Breath in, breath out. Check yourself. Thank the people around you for putting up with you, Don't expect for the society you are living in to apologize to you for the fact that they do things differently from you...Realize you need to change to be more culturally appropriate to them, not visa versa.
Step 5...Recognize your personal judgements, become aware, understand them, and let them go. Don't feel guilty for having judgments. Just recognize them and move on.

Rinse. Repete.